Merger mania! In 1997, I said that in five years there would be only two banks in the country, probably three shopping market chains, and one huge oil company (probably called ChevUpUrs).
Well, in the wake of the Exxon/Mobil deal and the AOL/Netscape deal, here are some new mergers we can expect to see:
1. Hale Business Systems, Mary Kay Cosmetics, Fuller Brush, & W.R.Grace Company merge to become - Hale Mary Fuller Grace.
2. Polygram Records, Warner Brothers, & Keebler Crackers will merge to become - Polly-Warner-Cracker.
3. 3M & Goodyear will merge to become - MMMGood.
4. John Deere & Abitibi-Price will merge to become - Deere Abi.
5. Zippo Manufacturing, Audi Motors, Dofasco, & Dakota Mining will merge to become - Zip Audi Do Da.
6. Honeywell, Imasco, & Home Oil will merge to become Honey I'm Home
7. Denison Mines, & Alliance & Metal Mining will merge to become Mine All Mine.
8. Federal Express & UPS will merge to become FED UPS
9. Xerox & Wurlitzer will merge and begin manufacturing reproductive organs.
10. Fairchild Electronics & Honeywell Computers will merge and become - Fairwell Honeychild
11. 3M, J.C. Penney & The Canadian Opera Company will merge and become - 3 Penney Opera
12. Grey Poupon & Dockers Pants will merge and become Poupon Pants
13. Knott's Berry Farm & National Organization of Women will merge and become - Knott NOW!
14. Searchbutton.com and Jelly Belly will become Search Belly Button.com